A Miracle Moment in Parenting

Two nights ago, I had a dream. My son was walking down the hall to his kindergarten class, alone. Standing alone watching him at the head of the hall, I raised my right hand in the universal sign language sign for "I love you" and aimed it, like a benediction, at his being.

Last night, I came home at 9:30 to my young son still awake, and my husband giving him the lesson of falling asleep by himself. This weekend he spent with friends while Fred and I were attending an out-of-town seminar, and all three nights away he did, indeed, put himself to sleep. But this was the first time in our home that he has done this, because prior to last night, one of us has laid down with him intil he is out cold, every night since he was born.

This morning on the sun-dappled walk to our car, Avi told me that Daddy is the person that he loves most in the world. I responded appreciatively, validating that feeling. Then he told me that he loves me second best and the reason he loves Daddy more is because he is a boy, too. Listening to all this, and noticing that I was responding from love and acceptance, was such a sweet experience. When we got out of our car at school, I knelt to the ground and hugged my son close and expressed my love and appreciation for him. Then he told me: "I will go to my classroom by myself."

"What?" I exclaimed. "Now that you are going to bed by yourself, you're going to do it ALL by yourself?" "I can't drive myself", he explained. So I accompanied him to the hallway and, like in my dream, held the hand sign "I love you" towards his being as he entered the world of his classroom.

Last note: Avi did call me to join him halfway down the hall, and I entered into the sanctuary space of his class with him. On the way we passed a teacher tuning a harp outside of her classroom and I acknowledged to him, "Mrs. Helwig is an angel." "I know", he said.